No More Silence — Voices Against Violence

Violence, first you think it is just physical, but verbally and mentally, the violence can exist and it can thrive. My first thought is that the outward signs of violence surely are so obvious. Surely, if the physical violence is there then this is just the beginning. As an outsider to this violence, one would feel like they have achieved some success in preventing the physical. What so many of us tend to not think of is that mentally the damage is there and is probably beyond what you can help with. The physical hurts for moments, but the mental is “engraved” — only accessible by the abuser (who doesn’t care) and the victim who does not see it as “bad” but as “love”.
My only experience with any abuse was just one day after I signed up to support Voices Against Violence. My daughter called me from school and asked if her and a friend could come and talk to me. Of course as a Mom, I am thinking the worst, and maybe it was the worst. The friend that came to talk to me had a previous relationship in which a young man had hurt her and for quite some time, before she sought help. This time she did not wait, which makes me so proud of her. The young man she was dating was friends with her previous boyfriend, and knew of the abuse that he was imposing upon her. One of her first comments was that she thought he felt he could do it because she had tolerated it before. I told her that is not justification by any means. She also talked about how she felt sorry for him and for his home life. I reminded her that regardless of anyone’s situation there is no reason for one human being to hurt another, physically or mentally.
Of course, our talk was longer than what I have divulged, but I am glad that she has realized that seeking help is the first step. That she did not have to face or deal with this on her own. I hope that everyone, men and women realize that this is about enhancing everyone’s way of life. Even if you are not in a first hand position of dealing with Violence, your own Voice against it is the best beginning to an end.

The Women’s Fund Birmingham is trying to help raise awareness in our community via their inaugural Blogging Against Violence today October 7th, any online support will function till the 15th of this month. If possible please visit the The Women’s Fund Birmingham Site and donate $25. The new media press event today will be from 3PM – 730PM.

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Violence, first you think it is just physical, but verbally and mentally, the violence can exist and it can thrive. My first thought is that the outward signs of violence surely are so obvious. Surely, if the physical violence is there then this is just the beginning. As an outsider to this violence, one would feel like they have achieved some success in preventing the physical. What so many of us tend to not think of is that mentally the damage is there and is probably beyond what you can help with. The physical hurts for moments, but the mental is “engraved” — only accessible by the abuser (who doesn’t care) and the victim who does not see it as “bad” but as “love”.

My only experience with any abuse was just one day after I signed up to support Voices Against Violence. My daughter called me from school and asked if her and a friend could come and talk to me. Of course as a Mom, I am thinking the worst, and maybe it was the worst. The friend that came to talk to me had a previous relationship in which a young man had hurt her and for quite some time, before she sought help. This time she did not wait, which makes me so proud of her. The young man she was dating was friends with her previous boyfriend, and knew of the abuse that he was imposing upon her. One of her first comments was that she thought he felt he could do it because she had tolerated it before. I told her that is not justification by any means. She also talked about how she felt sorry for him and for his home life. I reminded her that regardless of anyone’s situation there is no reason for one human being to hurt another, physically or mentally.

Of course, our talk was longer than what I have divulged, but I am glad that she has realized that seeking help is the first step. That she did not have to face or deal with this on her own. I hope that everyone, men and women realize that this is about enhancing everyone’s way of life. Even if you are not in a first hand position of dealing with Violence, your own Voice against it is the best beginning to an end.

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